Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
– the Golden rule
Why would you go ahead and ignore someone who gave you the time of day?
I never understood how someone would choose to ghost over a quick (and potentially uncomfortable) update.
While I can empathize and realize the reasoning behind ghosting, how it may be uncomfortable, and also how it is much easier than a reply, a quick message, or coming up with an excuse, it catches me by surprise over and over again.
If you gave me a time slot from your day to explain your process, tell me a story, have an open discussion or conversation, or answer some questions, wouldn’t you expect an update if I decided not to proceed with you?
It is so easy to politely reply with a ‘No, thank you’; it is so simple to even lie and explain that ‘management decided on a different route’; it is so quick to update that ‘it is out of our budget’, or that ‘we’ve stopped the activity’ or even that ‘we’ll need to think about it, and we’ll update should be of interest’.
Any of the above or any other reply may not include a smile, but it is better than falling off the face of the earth and simply ignoring someone who may be a total stranger, an ex-colleague, a contact, or even an actual friend (true story).
Ignoring and avoiding in place of an update doesn’t result in a better outcome, and it doesn’t leave a good impression, and it is not deserved…ever! In fact, it does the opposite and makes you look very unprofessional, leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and likely any future possibility to work together, collaborate, or assist one another is thrown out the window.
Have some common courtesy and decency, to take the extra 20-30 seconds and reject, turn down, and update the service provider that it is not going beyond the previous chat.
Wouldn’t you want the same courtesy if the tables were turned?